Jeff Light
1 min readDec 9, 2022

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Honestly, the real problem with dating advice (modern or archaic) tends to be that it's couched in uniform terms, as if the writer has figured out The Secret and is now delivering The One System To Rule Them All.

Truth is, there is not only room for some women to object to coffee dates and some women to like them, but there's also different types of coffee dates. And - I know this is a shocking statement on the internet but - context matters. It's very different to chat someone up at a mutual friend's party and then ask him/her out for coffee, versus to swipe right, exchange a couple messages, and then ask to chat over coffee.

Coffee dates can have a lot of great functions for both men and women, and they could also be dismissive or corrosive depending on the context and on how people execute them. It doesn't make for a very buzzy Medium article, but acknowledging that there are all kinds of people and all kinds of dating styles is the only practical dating advice people should be confident of.

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Jeff Light
Jeff Light

Written by Jeff Light

Physical nomad converted to digital; eating, drinking, reading, and tattooing my way around our little spinning rock. Medellín-based, find me on Letterboxd.

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